What I learned being a Mother
By Marty on May 4, 2011
By Marty Oravetz –
As a mother of three, stepmother of two, grandmother of 12 and great-grandmother of one, I’ve learned that being a mother is a lifetime occupation.
Every day is filled with trial and error and on the job training. A mother’s role changes everyday. Nonetheless, the blessings are unbelievable from start to finish.
Some things I learned being a mother include:
- When my children were growing up, the most important thing I learned was to be a listener. They need one-on-one time to express their joys, cares, and hopes.
- I learned to be an encourager, to help them reach for the stars and become the best they can be.
- You are not always your child’s best friend. Having clear rules and guidelines of acceptable behavior gives them security and shows how much you love them. I’ve also learned to apologize when I’m wrong.
- I’ve learned that at any given minute you might be a referee, a nurse, or rolling on the floor in laughter.
- I’ve learned that you pray, and you’re strongest, when a child or grandchild is in a wreck and in a coma, or breaks both legs skiing, or just has a fever.
- I’ve learned how important it is to accept their choices in life. Their careers and their mates are their choices and need to be embraced whole-heartedly.
I think the hardest thing to learn is to let go. You are still mom, just in a different role. You watch them go through the trials and joys of life from a distance. You still share these times with them, and you get the calls for advice, but the choices are theirs and sometimes you see them make the same mistakes you did. Just like when they were children, you help pick them up, dust them off and encourage them to try again.
Being a grandmother is a different role all over again. It’s learning to honor your children’s rules and guidelines for their own children. Sometimes you’re asked for advice, and sometimes you have to be still and quiet. They have to go through the same trial and error you did in raising them. Being involved in your grandchildren’s lives and activities gives both your children and your grandchildren an invaluable support group; besides, the blessings of knowing them and watching them grow into adults are too many to count.
Being a great-grandmother simply starts the process all over again. You see your children learning to let go as a grandparent too.
The memories are all so sweet. There are the one-on-one play dates.
Watching them dunk each other in the pool
.
The graduations.
The weddings.
And trying to get a family picture.
I think what I’ve learned the most is you don’t have to be a super-mom, you simply have to be there through all the stages of their lives with love, caring and support no matter what life throws at them. I’ve also learned they forgive you for all your mistakes because they know you really care.
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