By Marcia Rotella –
Have you spent the past 25 years or so taking so much care of others that you forgot how to take care of yourself?
If your wedding gown still fits and you have toddlers at your feet, then this post is not really meant for you. Now is your time to give all of you and 20 years from now you’ll see all that you gave smiling back at you in the eyes of your children.
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For us, shall we say, veteran givers, who have young adult children (at home or away) and have been married for over a quarter of a century (yes, I like to stress it that way) I am here to emphasize something to all of us.
We are not finished by a long shot!
Although my mind and my body are conspiring against me these days, the reality of this crossroad is that we are not finished giving. Yet, somewhere along the most gratifying calling of my life, I’ve grown quite tired of taking care of others.
These days I envision myself holding up picket signs which might read something like this:
“Contrary to what I’ve led you to believe, it’s not all about you.”
“Yes, I’m getting my hair done by a professional before your next dental appointment.”
“Let me introduce you to the washing machine.”
“Let’s read the name on the car title, shall we?”
“What’s wrong with a sandwich for dinner?”
So what does happen when we’ve taken such good care of others and wonder how to begin taking better care of ourselves? What happens when even our hormones are literally lighting a fire under us making us question where our dreams and gifts ever went? Why do I feel like I’m losing myself?
I took this very question to our heavenly Father during one of my recent morning walks and His answer was as simple as can be. “The more you lose yourself, the more you gain Me.”
Wives, Moms, and all tired givers, we can do this! We can keep that answer before us and know that He who empowered us to give for a quarter of a century or however long the journey, can empower us to give without limits. Isn’t that how He gives to us?
Yes, some days I struggle as I try to find the creative girl which put aside her own aspirations for the sake of others, but then I remind myself of my greatest dream–being able to stay home and be a full-time wife and mother. Regardless of the natural changes during this time of my life, I must remind myself that I have lived out my greatest dream and I’m not losing myself, I’m gaining Christ.
In the meantime, treat yourself guiltlessly. Taking care of ourselves is crucial in our line of work. A day at the spa, a girls’ night out, prayer or an invigorating walk makes a world of difference. And of course, there’s always chocolate.
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After marrying in 1985, Marcia Rotella dreamed of some day being a stay-at-home mom. For 20 years now she has been living out her dream. She is still married to her college sweetheart and loves being the mother of two young adults she calls her babies. She enjoys blogging as a creative expression of her greatest passion–to minister the love of God through encouragement while sharing the simple joys of making a home. You may visit Marcia’s blog, One Heart at Home, at: http://homeiswhereoneheartis.blogspot.com/.
1 thought on “I’m Losing Myself”
Okay, so I gain Christ.
The best gift ever.
But, I think I am still going to make some picket signs.
😉