By Kelli Parisian–
When you reach a certain age, and attend enough Memorials/Celebrations of Life, you begin to ponder the topic of death more often, and more seriously. People will say death is a part of life, but when it hits close to home, this statement seems sadly insufficient.
Recently, I attended the Celebration of life for my best friends 22 yr old daughter, Hannah Rose. Last year, it was the celebration of life for another family friends son, Adam. Both, went home to be with Jesus too soon. It’s times like these, I admit my faith is tested. My nature is to always want to know why; to make sense of the senseless.
It is painful to see my friends hurt, and to know, while I can’t fully understand their pain…it just hurts to see them hurt, period.
I can say to my friends, “It was God’s timing,” and as a Christian, I know this to be true. I also know that reminding them, “He/she’s with Jesus now,” is also true, but, I suspect these kind of well intentioned comments don’t bring much comfort to my friends.
I am reminded that my God knows about the kind of pain they are experiencing, though. He experienced it, with his own son. I also know that his Son felt pain for others who experienced deaths sting. In John 11:33, Jesus sees Mary weeping over the death of her brother Lazarus, and the bible says, “he was deeply moved in Spirit and troubled.”
Were the deaths of my friend’s children both untimely? They both knew the Lord, and were strong in their faith. It is only we, who question His timing.
Death is only untimely, when were not prepared to die.
God is big enough to answer all my questions, when I get there. In the meantime, I will continue to trust that he has a plan in everything.
I can also honor the memory of these two young people by being there for their families, and encouraging them to continue to share their happy memories of their children, Hannah and Adam. I know they will never “get over it,” the pain will simply be….different.
I read, the best thing you can do for a grieving friend, is to, “Get out of your head, and into your heart.” Our head gets stuck in trying to analyze situations, trying to think of the right thing to say. Our heart does not have to try hard to find the right thing to say. It just knows it intuitively.
Think less, feel more, honor the memories of those who have lost loved ones…simple, really.