Discovering My Best Yes

By on May 30, 2017
The Best Yes: Making Wise Decisions in the Midst of Endless Demands

By Joyell Nevins –

“Let’s use the two most powerful words, yes and no, with resounding assurance, graceful clarity, and guided power.” Lysa Terkheurst

I am discovering my Best Yes. I am learning that saying no to some things allows me to say yes to others, and that there is power in being intentional with my time.

It started with a book I’ve been delving into called “The Best Yes: Making Wise Decisions in the Midst of Endless Demands” by Lysa Terkheurst. See, there are some things God is very clear about – He is good, the devil is bad. Speak truth; don’t tell lies. Worship Him; don’t idolize anyone else.

What He does not give a specific directive about is the best way for us to spend our time. My schedule and what I choose to allow on it or not allow is unique to me. What’s the best way for me to use my time, or the tasks for me to do so I can best serve my God and my family, might not look like yours. And that’s okay.

The concept of the Best Yes is being clear about what is most important to me, and what decisions will  help me get there. It gives me the freedom to say no without guilt, and reminds me to extend that same grace to others. Because to say yes to some thing, means you have to say no to something else. I’m intentional about my “no’s” so I can say yes when I need to.

Terkheurst put it this way: “We can’t forget why we give small “no” answers. It’s so we can have the white space and wherewithal to recognize God’s assignments and give Best Yes answers to those.”

And the “best part” of a Best Yes is the opportunity to live a fulfilled life! You’re not so stressed out by all these responsibilities, or so isolated by no interactions, that you miss the special moments that make life juicy sweet.

I saw this play out clearly the other day. The original plan was for me and a friend to support another girlfriend (we’ll call her Lynn) at a business happy hour event. I was in the middle of writing a story and completing an assignment, when I heard from my friend that she would not be able to make the event.

Now, I still could have gone by myself. But I knew what I was in the middle of really needed to be finished first. And in this case, although Lynn would certainly be disappointed, it wouldn’t make or break the happy hour event if I didn’t come. So my Best Yes was to stay home and complete the work I was doing.

Then about 8 o’clock that same evening, I got a text from Lynn saying the event was over, the spa in her apartment complex was hot, and would I like to come over. My initial thought was no – I have been working all day, and I just want to stay home and chill.

But this time, I felt it was important to make time for Lynn. My responsibilities were finished for the day, and although I would now have to get suited up and get in the car, there was nothing that saying “yes” was going to interfere with.

I hope you have stuck with me so far, because here’s where the story gets juicy sweet. Normally, late on a weeknight, Lynn’s complex’s hot tub would be empty. This time, there was another couple there.

A couple who we had never met, but we discovered had just been through some devastating life situations. Lynn and I got the opportunity to give them a chance to share, to love them, and even to pray with them.

When the woman was talking about what had just happened to her family and started to break down emotionally, Lynn just got up, strode across the hot tub, enveloped this woman in a hug and started to pray for her. She spoke truth and life into that woman’s heart and situation. That random hot tub served as a safe space for the woman and her husband to begin a journey of healing.

If I had said yes to the happy hour event, I definitely would have gone home afterwards. While I’m sure it would have been a fun business evening, I would have missed the hot tub conversation.

If I had said no to the hot tub, I would have stayed home and probably gotten some extra sleep, maybe some enjoyment out of reading a favorite book. But I would have missed the opportunity to minister to someone’s heart.

And that’s what I have discovered lies behind the Best Yes. The ability to live my very best life so God can pour His love into me, and that I can then pour it out into others.

The decisions we make determine the schedules we keep.

The schedules we keep determine the lives we live.

And how we live our lives determines how we spend our souls.

Lysa Terkeurst, “The Best Yes”

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Discovering My Best Yes